Running on Emptiness

Do you go through those times where motivation is so hard to find. I still love to run, however, finding time is a bear, and getting out the door after 10 pm or in the early AM does not seem to be happening either. I am having a rough patch with life in general so it is affecting the running as well. It is like I just don't care about much of anything. Sorry for being a downer, but that is where I am. It will pass. It always does. I would like something new in my life, new job, new car something.... Alas, but that will not correct the hollowness inside.

Only the dvine can fill me. Hmmm now I know this is a running blog, but it has to be more than that at times. I am not in the black place where all that is, is to not hurt myself or others...... but neither am I in a place of tolerance and caring and kindness. It seems just beyond my grasp.

I am finding life hard to do right now. I am not keeping pace with all that needs to be done. The house is a wreck, deadlines are not being met at work, I am not finding joy in Ultimate, I am irritated by my own kid often and more irritated at myself for that. He cries constatly it seems. I know this is not true, but my distorted reality would make it seem so.

Even this blog that very few reads seems meaningless.

I tried to broach the subject of meaning with my mentors last night but it was not quite the appropriate time....

I will put on my running shoes, and that in part, will see me through.

Be well,

Curtai